Bill Clinton Statue Committee
Dear Friend:

We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee for raising
five million dollars for placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the Hall
of Fame in Washington, D.C.

This committee was in a quandary as to where to place the statue.  It
was not wise to place it beside the statue of George Washington, who
never told a lie, nor beside Newt Gingrich, who never told the truth,
since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference.

We finally decided to place it beside Christopher Columbus, the
greatest Democrat of all.  He left not knowing where he was going, and
did not know where he was.  He returned not knowing where he had been,
and did it all on borrowed money.

Over 5,000 years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up
your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the
Promised Land." Nearly 5,000 years later, Roosevelt said, "Lay down
your shovels,   sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, for this is
the Promised Land."  Now Bill Clinton is going to steal your shovels,
kick your asses, raise the price of Camels, and mortgage the Promised
Land.

If you are one of the fortunate people who has anything left after
paying taxes, we expect a generous contribution to this worthwhile
project.

Fraternally,

The Bill Clinton Statue Committee

P.S. It is said that Bill Clinton is considering changing the
democratic party emblem from a donkey to a condom, because it stands
for inflation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives a false sense of
security while being screwed.