Question & Answer Time

Q. What is a Yankee? 
 A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone. 
  
Q. What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? 
 A. Lickalotopuss. 
  
Q. What kind of bees give milk? 
 A. Boo bees. 
  
Q. What do gay men refer to hemorrhoids as? 
 A. Speed bumps. 
  
Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common? 
 A. They both like a tight seal. 
  
Q. What has three teeth and sixty feet? 
 A. The front row at a Willy Nelson concert. 
  
Q. What is the new O.J. website address? 
 A. slash slash backslash escape. 
  
Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common? 
 A. The balls are just for decoration. 
  
Q. What did the banana say to the vibrator? 
 A. What are YOU shaking for?  She is going to eat me! 
  
Q. What is the difference between erotic and kinky? 
 A. Erotic is using a feather....kinky is using the whole chicken. 
  
Q. What is the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaah? 
 A. About three inches. 
  
Q. What is the difference between a hormone, and an enzyme? 
 A. You can't hear an enzyme. 
  
Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? 
 A. One. Men will screw anything. 
  
Q. What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? 
 A. One is made of plastic and dangerous for children to play with...the 
    other is used to carry groceries. 

Q. What is the last thing they give Tickle Me Elmo before he leaves the 
   factory? 
 A. Two test-tickles. 
  
Q. What's the difference between a man and Christmas decorations? 
 A. Christmas decorations stay up longer. 

Q. What do you get when you get Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Dough Boy 
   together? 
 A. A red headed bitch with a yeast infection 

Q. How do you piss off Winnie The Pooh? 
 A. By sticking your finger in his honey 

Q. What is the ultimate rejection? 
 A. When your masturbating and your hand falls asleep 

Q. What did Bill Clinton say to Monica? 
 A. I told you to lick my erection, not wreck my election. 

Q. What does pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common? 
 A. Both can smell it but can't eat it 

Q. What do you call a blonde with pigtails? 
 A. A blow job with handle bars 

Q. What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates? 
 A. A mobile sperm bank. 

Q. What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head? 
 A. All you can eat for under a buck. 

Q. What do you get when you mix a rooster with a telephone pole? 
 A. A 30ft cock that wants to reach out and touch someone 

Q. What's the difference between a golf ball and a woman's G-spot? 
 A. A guy will take twenty minutes to look for a golf ball. 

Q: How do you get your wife to scream while you are having an orgasm? 
 A: Call her and tell her where you are. 

Q: What's the difference between light and hard? 
 A: You can go to sleep with a light on. 

Q: What's the difference between dark and hard? 
 A: It stays dark all night. 

Q: What's the difference between a BONUS and a PENIS? 
 A: Your wife will blow your bonus. 

Q: What's the difference between a wife and a job? 
 A: After 20 years, the job STILL sucks. 

Q: What is the definition of wicker box? 
 A: It's what Elmer Fudd wants to do to Madonna. 

Q: How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist? 
 A: A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs. 

Q: What is the biggest problem for an atheist? 
 A: No one to talk to during orgasm. 

Q: What is Rodeo Sex? 
 A: Well, it's where your wife is on all fours, you are firmly 
    ensconced from the rear with a breast in each hand, and you say 
    to her: "This is the way your sister likes it too."  You have eight 
    seconds to stay in the saddle. 

Q: If you are having sex with two women and one more woman walks in, 
   what  do you have? 
 A: Divorce proceedings, most likely. 

Q: Why do married men like blowjobs so much? 
 A: 15 minutes of silence.