The New Serenity Prayer

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the
courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to
hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they
pissed me off.  And also, help me to be careful of the toes I
step on today as they be connected to the ass that I may have
to kiss tomorrow.

Help me to always give 100% at work...

12% on Monday.

23% on Tuesday.

40% on Wednesday.

20% on Thursday.

5% on Friday.

And help me to remember ... When I'm having a really bad day
and it seems that people are trying to piss me off, that it
takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 ... to extend my middle
finger and tell them to bite me! 

Amen.