Windows 98 Southern Edition


Dear Consumers:
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS
98 SUTHERN EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside
the South. If you have one of these, you may need some help
understanding the commands.

The southern edition may be recognized by the unique opening
screen. It reads "WINDERS 98" and has a background picture of
General Robert E. Lee superimposed on a Confederate flag. It
is shipped with a Dukes of Hazzard screen saver.

Also note:
a. The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
b. My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
c. Dial up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
d. Control Panel is known as the "The Dashboard"
e. Hard Drive is referred to as "4 Wheel Drive"
f. Floppies are "them little ol plastic disc thangs"
g. Instead of an error message, a "garbage bag and roll of duct
   tape" pops up

CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN SUTHERN EDITION:
a. OK: ats aw-right
b. Cancel: piss on it
c. Retry: try er agin
d. Yes: yep
e. No: nope
f. Find: hunt fer it
g. Go to: head over yonder
h. Back: back yonder
i. Help: hep me out here
j. Stop: kwitit
k. Start: crank er up
l. Settings: sittins
m. Programs: stuff at duz stuff
n. Documents: stuff ah done did